The Vegas Pool – Summer of Sin
Are you wet yet?
Folks, I’ll cut to the chase – while Summer doesn’t officially start until June 20 or 21, Vegas is already heating up literally and welcomes back my favorite time of year. People complain about the heat in Vegas (it’s a dry heat), the unbearable scorch hitting you from every direction, and the dehydration that can never be quenched. Whatever! Drink more and use the sunscreen!
Summer in Vegas is wonderful. It helps that I tan well.
So…that brings us here…I’m going to ruminate for a bit. I’m not an expert on anything. This is all my pure unadulterated opinion. But, I’m gonna guess I’ve been to Vegas about 100 times in 20 years, so there’s that. Three parts…the 3 Ps…pool…people…and promos.
THE POOL IS THE BEST PLACE EVER. If you don’t make time for pool time during Summer in Vegas, you are missing out. Sure, you might be one of the many burners out there but that’s nothing a hearty dop of sunscreen and a purty hat can’t fix.
Here’s what you need to know to be successful at pool season :
- 1. Be ready to drink. That means you should do two things. Eat something and pre-game. Don’t go overboard. Being in or around a pool with too much food in the belly is not awesome. The pre-game is the drink or drinks you have in the room before you hit the pool. This will save you from some of the spendy drink prices you’ll find at the pool. That said, pool drinks are fun. They’re trashy. They’re effective. They’re my best friend. Caesars Palace Las Vegas pool…Zeus Juice…the pitcher…trust me.
- 2. Don’t be a seat hog. I like to hit the pool early and hang out for a long time. I like to be able to choose my chair and claim it. Some people like to choose their chair and then take off thinking that towel over the chair will hold it infinitely. NOPE. I will watch your chair for an hour and if leave the pool area and don’t come back, that bitch is MINE…even if I already have a chair…just ‘cause…I need it.
- 3. Use sunscreen. Get in pool with drink. Get out of pool. Apply more sunscreen. Don’t forget your ears and scalp. DONE.
- 4. Don’t let your friend Rachel pour a pitcher of Strawberry Daquiri on you at the Monte Carlo pool. That might just be me…she also throws drinks at the elderly on planes.
- 5. If you’re into it, hit a day club for super loud jams, pee in the pool, bros and hos abound, and a reminder of your college days. NOT. FOR. ME. But kids, you have fun…the Marquee Dayclub at Cosmo sounds super fun…and loud…when I’m trying to day nap (or disco nap, as my friend John calls it…disco…was a genre many many years ago, kids).
- 6. DO A POOL PROP. Listen, I’m an introvert, but the pool is a social place. Talk to people…make some temporary best friends forever at the pool. Let them use your sunscreen. Buy them a bucket of beer. You’ll see…it’ll come back to you and you’ll have a great time!
That’s it folks. Go pool (it’s a verb). Get that tan. Rock it out. (Be sure to also visit part #2!)